21ST CENTURY GENTLEMAN

I have had, for a long time, a deep, niggling ache to see the world become a better place.. more morals, ethics, kindness and empathy. More selfless, less selfish.

Specifically I have been passionate about ‘bringing back the gentleman’. Considering men are around 50% of the population on our beautiful planet, we have a huge responsibility, but also capacity, to make strong, foundational change for a better planet...for us all. I firmly believe that positive change starts on an individual level, one gentleman at a time….because the ripples, the ‘pay it forward’, the lasting and positive impact of just one good man can have an immense affect on many.

In the past few decades, we've seen a lot of changes in our society and culture. With the rise of social media, the push for equal rights and opportunities, and the influence of popular culture, traditional values and norms have been challenged and redefined.

But one thing that has remained constant is the importance of being a gentleman. The notion of a gentleman has been around for centuries, and while certain aspects of that ideal have evolved over time, the core values and ideals remain just as relevant today as ever before… and arguably more needed right now. I think the world has seen enough of Politicians, Movie, Sports and Music stars, and people in influential positions (many with little talent and less morals) behaving badly. These people are NOT aspirational, and any man, young or old should be able to decipher this, and choose the opposite path.

So what exactly does it mean to be a gentleman in the 21st century?

At the core of the gentleman ideal are values such as respect, courtesy, and chivalry. These traits are timeless, and regardless of whatever else changes in the world around us, they will always be appreciated and admired.

A 21st-century gentleman offers a calming and confident presence in any situation. He is always polite, courteous and respectful to those around him, whether they're friends, family, acquaintances, or strangers. He sets a positive example for others to follow by demonstrating appropriate behaviour and attitude in his words and crucially actions. He holds himself accountable, he has strong self respect, takes care of himself both physically and mentally where he can, and makes an effort to maintain his integrity, character and, to those that matter, reputation ( Never let the 'drama' of false reputations detract from who you really are).

He is adaptable to changing societal trends in a way that doesn't compromise his core values. For instance, while gender roles and expectations have changed a lot in recent times, a gentleman understands that women still appreciate men who are courteous, considerate, and respectful….but let’s not assign showing gentlemanly traits to one gender. A true gentleman is a gentleman to all. 

As a keen observer of human nature, a gentleman takes the time to listen to others, empathise with their struggles, and offer support whenever possible. He is always ready to offer a helping hand to those in need, and he does so without expecting anything in return. Crucially, gentlemen must do good without expectation of reward, but simply because it is in their character, otherwise your efforts may be driven by the Ego Mind which I'll talk about in another article. Ego has a place, but not in the actions of a gentleman. 

So what does a gentleman offer to society? First and foremost, he sets an inspiring example of what it means to be a good person and an upstanding member of society. By demonstrating fairness, kindness, and respect in all of his interactions with others, he creates a positive ripple effect that benefits everyone within his sphere of influence.

Beyond that, a gentleman plays an important role in promoting healthy relationships between men and women. He understands the importance of breaking down gender stereotypes, treating others with respect and fairness, and promoting equality and empowerment for all.

In today's world, there is a lot of vitriol and hate being thrown around on social media and in other arenas. A gentleman counteracts this negativity by promoting kindness, compassion, and understanding, thereby contributing to a more inclusive and harmonious society. Imagine all the hate, woke-ness, one sidedness, and trolls being counteracted by empathy, acceptance, compassion and mature conversations?

So I believe the importance of being a gentleman in the 21st century cannot be overstated. By embodying traits such as respect, courtesy, and chivalry, a gentleman offers a calm and confident presence in any situation, sets a positive example for others to follow, promotes healthy relationships between men and women, and contributes to a more inclusive and harmonious society. At a time when so many people seem focused on tearing each other down and promoting their own interests above all else, the world needs more gentlemen than ever before.  I’ve witnessed too many boys and young men trundle through the most formative years of their lives with either poor key male role models, or completely absent positive male influence. And it's never their own fault, however the negative repercussions of absent gentleman’s influence can be devastating to a young man’s entire future. In articles to come I will touch on more detailed, positive things we can all do, for ourselves, and those around us to break dangerous and damaging cycles, and to create a world with more gentlemen.

I hope you will join me.

Adam Taylor 

Octane Founder